As we all know, the Reps are just itching to get back into power and they actually think they have a chance this year to make some significant changes. So I’ve been reading up on their ideas and I’ve come up with what they have in mind for us, if and when this great upheaval occurs.

1. Dismantle those dreadful health-care programs that Obama is so proud of.
2. Take the Tarp money away from all the banks and let them fail. Dog-gone it, there is no such thing as “too big to fail”. Just let them fail, who cares! Conveniently forget that it was the banks that failed in the Great Depression and in the four years of the Hoover administration, nothing occurred to help the US economy. It was only when FDR arrived on the scene that things started to get better.
3. Same for car companies, take that Tarp money away from them too. Who needs car companies if they can’t make it.
4. Use that Tarp money to pay down the national debt, or least the debt that Obama created. The 7 Trillion that Bush spent is sacred and doesn’t need to be repaid.
5. Dismantle the Green Revolution. Don’t do anything to curb global warming because as we all know, it’s just a hoax concocted by liberal eggheads who really have no clue about what’s actually going on.
6. Also conveniently forget that it was Bush who got us into the mess in Iraq and Afghanistan in the first place and left a monumental fuck up for Obama to fix. Complain loudly about the cost of the war.
7. Declare torture as legal as long as you call it something else.
8. Once and for all, take away the right of women to have abortions, even though it is in fact a constitutional right. At the same time, keep misinterpreting the constitution with regard to guns, claiming that individuals, including gangs and gun nuts, are in fact well armed militiamen, which is what the constitution calls for: a well armed militia. To Republicans, gangs are well-armed militias. However, don’t ask who they might be protecting.
9. Give big tax breaks to big businesses who have managed to overcome all odds and are now back in business making huge profits without the need to rehire old employees. They deserve to keep everything they make.
10. The model city for this administration will be: Detroit. Housing prices are extremely low and there are plenty of jobs in Detroit for private security firms to protect well-to-do neighborhoods. Also on the horizon more work is planned — digging moats and fences to protect those neighborhoods. As soon as the fence building is complete along the Texas border with Mexico they will start on the Detroit fences and moats, alligators will be optional.

There’s more:
11. Combine church with state. Down with democracy, up with theocracy. Oh, and dash of hypocrisy too. Put God in charge but don’t forget who pays the bills for the GOP to stay in power: big business, big oil, big pharma, and of course, the ever-lovin’ NRA.
12. There doesn’t seem to be any plan for the future, there are no ideas about how to solve the depression (the new one just created when the banks fail), or unemployment, or the state of the rest of the world, but nobody expects us to. After all, we’re the Party of No. We don’t think ahead, and we don’t care about “others”, only stupid liberals do that.

And finally, thinking about the next presidential election, recreate the glory of the Bush years by running Sarah Palin for president, Rush Limbaugh for VP and Glen Beck for Secretary of State or Defense or maybe both.

So, if all of this really resonates with you, hurry up and join the nearest Tea Party. You are a tried and true Republican. If, however, it makes you sick at heart, you are probably a liberal.